Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘Pediatrics’ Category

Colorful….

Mom frantic, phoning about her little 2 year old boy (why am I not surprised!):

Mom:  My little boy has colored with non-toxic markers all over his body.  He even marked up his penis, under the foreskin.

Me: Well, you are lucky it’s non-toxic!

Mom: How do I wash it off without hurting him?

Me: Why bother washing it off? Just leave it.  I am sure he will get plenty of baths and it will eventually come off!

 

(And I am sure no one is going to see it anyway…….)

Read Full Post »

Caller phoned because her now screaming 2-year-old bit a hole through his tongue which is, of course, bleeding profusely…Caller advised to have it seen by an MD…

Caller:   But – I can’t take him to see an MD – I have a baby to take care of here too, and my husband has a fractured toe and he can’t walk and I have to work in a while and I still have to go to the grocery store and my friends are coming over for a party tonight……

Me: (in my head) Yup. Sooooo inconvenient…..

Read Full Post »

Caller is concerned when at school, Hep B+ child bleeds and Caller’s child is exposed:

CALLER:  My 9 year old was helping another child who had a bleeding nose and got blood on his arm.

ME: ok…..and?

CALLER: I found out that other child has Hepatitis B and the blood got into a scrape on my son’s arm. I am worried. What do I do now?

ME: are his immunizations up to date? Namely Hep B?

CALLER: Oh no – I don’t believe in Immunizations.   

ME (In my head): this is exactly why we immunize!!!!

Read Full Post »

Caller phones in – kid with gastric upset, no diarrhea, no fever, is voiding normally and no hx head injury:

CALLER: Hi, my 2 1/2 year old is vomiting!!!

ME: When did it start and how many times?

CALLER: Just now – and she has vomited TWICE! Should I go to ED???

ME: No ….not necessarily – let me ask you a few more questions…..

CALLER: But she is NEVER sick!!!!

ME: It happens…..

CALLER: Can I give her Tylenol????

ME: Why would you give Tylenol?? She isn’t having pain and there is no fever……it might even make her vomit more….. and could even mask symptoms you are looking for and make her appear sicker than she actually is….

CALLER: Oh……yeah…..

Q#1: Why do people think that if, up until now, their child has NEVER been sick – why do they think they will never get sick – EVER??

Q#2: Why is it that people think they need to automatically drug their kids, even when it is inappropriate?

Read Full Post »

Screaming kid

Mom has had her 4 year old to the Clinic, had rash ID’d and was told to treat symptoms at home:

CALLER: I have a screaming kid here, what can I do? Her rash is really bothering her.

ME: Did your MD prescribe any cortisone cream?

CALLER: Yes, but my daughter won’t let me put it on her.

ME: Have you tried an oatmeal bath?

CALLER: She doesn’t want to go in the bath.

ME: Have you tried benadryl (or whatever was rx’d)?

CALLER: She won’t take any pills.

ME: How about cool cloths on her skin…?

CALLER: SHE DOESN’T LIKE THAT!!!!!

ME:  Ma’am. I am trying to help you here…..

CALLER: YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!

ME: I have been…..

CALLER: YOU KEEP TELLING ME TO DO STUFF SHE DOESN’T WANT TO DO!!!!

ME: Who is the parent here?   Sometimes there are things a child wants to do but you wouldn’t let her because it’s dangerous….do you stop her or let her go ahead?  Same thing.

Once again, I don’t have that magic wand……………..

Read Full Post »

Definitely Not #3

CALLER: my 3 month old baby just sneezed. (no other symptoms) Should I take him to the ED?

ME: Sneezing is something we all do – it’s normal…….

Read Full Post »

Distraught mother phoning about her 2-year-old (highly edited):

CALLER: my baby has hives ALL OVER HER BODY!!!! We are just getting ready to go to ED!!!!

ME: They usually don’t like to see RASHES land on the doorstep of EDs or Clinics unannounced….is she breathing OK?

CALLER: OF COURSE SHE IS!!! It’s this rash all over her body!!!!

ME: So they are all over her neck and face ?

CALLER: No….

ME: …all over her back and chest?

CALLER: No….

ME: …all over her legs???

CALLER: No…

ME: …all over her arms????

CALLER: No….

ME: Well, that’s pretty much all the body parts….

CALLER: there is one spot on her hip and three on her knees and one by her ear……

ME: Do they bother her?

CALLER: No

ME: Does she have a fever?

CALLER: No

ME: any swelling or open areas?

CALLER: No.

ME: I believe you would be safe to stay home and just keep an eye on it…….

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »